Your Mindset: Is It Helping Or Hurting You?

For years, Jodi had wanted to change careers and start her own business. She no longer enjoyed the work she did or the company she did it for.  And, yet she felt stuck and powerless to change her circumstances.

Whenever, she thought about doing something different, like starting a business doing the kind of work that made her heart sing, or even just changing jobs she would soon find herself pulling back. She would think things like, “There wasn’t any kind of better future for her. She didn’t know anything about running a business. And she was too old to get a better job. And, there was always the possibility things could be worse. It was better to just stay where she was.”

You know the saying . . . it was the devil she knew.  And even though she was miserable, there was a kind of comfort in knowing what to expect.

An Opportunity For Change

One day while complaining about her job and her life to a friend, her friend encouraged her to try to think about things more positively. She told her to try to change her mindset about the situation. Instead of thinking she was too old, or would never find anything better, why not try the idea that a better job was just waiting for her to come along, or that she could learn about how to start a business.

Although Jodi thought the idea was silly, she decided to stay open to the possibility that she could in fact find better work. She updated her resume and sent it out to several companies. She updated her professional social network, and she went on interviews. Within six weeks, Jodi had a dream job offer doing the kind of work she loved and giving her the opportunity to learn about running that kind of business to boot. Plus, it came with a bigger salary and benefits too. For the first time in her life, Jodi realized that her mindset could either help her or hurt her.

What Is A Positive Mindset?

Some people get really annoyed when they hear the term “positive” mindset. It just kind of feels a little too “woo wooish,” for them to be bothered with. Heck, you might be one of them.

The idea of a “positive mindset” often gets a bad rap because too many people think it means that if you just think positive thoughts about something long enough it’ll come to you. Others take it to an almost toxic level believing a positive mindset means you can’t ever feel bad about anything, or acknowledge negative circumstances or situations when you’re faced with them.

But nothing could be further from the truth.

I mean, if all we had to do was think about what we want and it appeared, there’d probably be a lot more lottery winners in the world today, right? Besides, the reality is that we all face circumstances and situations from time to time that are “less than optimal” to put it nicely.

I could go on a rant about just those two topics alone! But, I digress . . .

The truth, as you already know, is that you definitely can’t just put what you want out there in the universe and expect it to show up without you doing the work to make it happen. Yet, it’s equally true that you’ll never accomplish anything without first being open to new possibilities.  And the more open you are to those possibilities, the clearer you can envision or imagine them manifesting in the world, in your world, the more likely you are to take the necessary actions to make it happen.

A Positive Mindset Is Not A Magic Wand

Having a positive mindset doesn’t mean you believe that you’ll automatically get the position you interviewed for, or that your project will get the funding needed or even that you’ll never feel bad or have to face negative circumstances or situations. But it does mean that you trust that if you do everything in your power to achieve whatever it is you’re after, that in the process, you will attract the people, opportunities and situations into your life you need to help you make that happen.

Or as a friend of mine would say . . . A positive mindset is being able to see every “no” as a “not yet” on your journey to your desired outcome.

Is Your Mindset Keeping You Stuck?

Everyone carries certain beliefs with them. These beliefs are mindsets that either propel you forward toward the life of your dreams or keep you where you are, seemingly stuck with your current situation.

The truth is, in order to make a difference in your life, you have to embrace a different mindset. Because nothing changes unless you make it change. You have to be the change you want to see. However, it doesn’t have to be big changes. You can start small. This new mindset might be a simple one.

Jodi’s new mindset was simply that she was going to put serious effort into finding a new job for eight weeks. She figured if she gave it her best for two months and saw no results then she’d only lost the time spent job-searching.

How Is Your Mindset Affecting You?

Jodi had avoided mirrors since her divorce and rarely shared her ideas at her old job because her co-workers would make fun of her for being silly and impractical and often referred to her as the old crone. She was overweight and she felt heavy and frumpy and ugly.
But, after working in her new job for a few months Jodi realized she felt lighter and much happier. She liked coming to work and talking with her co-workers. Her new boss and even her co-workers liked her ideas and were often excited about helping her bring them to life.

One day she decided to stop at a new coffee shop on the way to work and pickup coffee and pastries for everyone to show her gratitude. The shop had a big mirror near the counter and Jodi couldn’t help but catch her reflection . . . she wasn’t ugly at all she thought with surprise. And she had actually lost a lot of weight.

You’re Shaping Your Mindset Daily

Like Jodi, you may not realize it, but you are shaping your mindset daily. In fact, everything you let into your consciousness affects your mindset. From the books you read to the news you consume, the social media networks you browse that feed you more and more of whatever you look at regularly, and most certainly the running conversation you have going on in your head about who and what you are.

Think about it, you are being constantly bombarded with both positive and negative content and information.

So becoming more intentional about what you let into your consciousness – like eliminating more negative content and bringing in more positive— can have a dramatic impact on your mindset. And give you more control over the narrative of your life. After all, it’s hard to be positive if you’re constantly consuming negative content that leaves you feeling anxious, depressed, angry, or fearful. Or worse continuously attributing negative traits to yourself and downplaying what you’re capable of.

Is It Possible to Intentionally Change Your Mindset?

After all your years of living, you might be wondering if it’s even possible to change your mindset. Maybe you’ve always struggled with a negative mindset. Perhaps your whole family has struggled with it for generations. Now you feel mired in this generational curse, believing that things simply don’t work out for you and your family.

But what if you challenged these beliefs? What if you became intentional with the thoughts you think and the content you consume? How would things change for you if you surrounded yourself with positive friends and limited your interactions with negative ones?

Would you feel differently if you began seeking out people that were running hard after the exact same goals you wanted? What if you tried different things instead of relying on the same old experiences?

Suppose you gave yourself permission to change even after years or decades of being the person you are? What if you held space for yourself to simply become a better version of who you already are?

I can tell you from personal experience that change like this doesn’t happen by accident. It takes making intentional choices. Choices that are sometimes difficult and put you in situations that make you uncomfortable. Like leaving the conversation when your co-workers start to gossip or limiting your time around that one negative friend.

But, I can also tell you, that it’s doable. All of those little choices begin to add up. The more you go after what you want—a positive mindset—the more likely you are to gain it. That doesn’t mean that everything will fall together in your life or that you’ll suddenly get what you’ve always wanted. However, the process of adopting a positive mindset does make it more likely that you’ll begin to create more of what you want in your life.

Change Can Feel Scary

Still, making these changes by yourself can be scary. This is where surrounding yourself with other people who want a positive mindset is so important. You might want to consider joining a support group or a mastermind of people who are trying to improve their lives in some way.

For example, if you want to eat healthier, then making new friends with people that want the same thing means that you’re more likely to pursue your goal. The reason for this is that you’ll feel supported, and you can share your struggles with those who understand.

Of course, not everyone wants to share their journey with others in a support group or a mastermind. If that’s the case, you might benefit from getting private feedback from a mentor or a coach. Your coach can work with you to develop a positive mindset, discover your goals, and develop a framework that lets you design the life of your dreams.

If you’d like to learn more about changing your mindset, download your free planner:
Embracing a Positive Mindset for the New You today.

 


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mindset, Positivity

Pam

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About the Author

Pam Hamilton is a mindset and visibility coach who's serious about helping women over 50 get past the mindset hurdles that keep them invisible and playing small. She does this with her signature "Practicing the Ten Principles of Visibility and "Mindset Reset" coaching programs so you can finally find the courage to seen and achieve the success breakthrough you want and deserve. Visit: BuildingVisibility.com/gift to grab your Free Visibility Journal.


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